Most of you know by now that I struggled with an eating disorder (EDNOS) for over ten years. The thing that put me in recovery was fat acceptance. Before fat acceptance I suffered through diet after diet. Calorie counting was my thing. All in the name of thinness- a goal I never reached. I've also struggled with hypothyroidism for over a decade and bipolar for about two decades- both of which cause weight gain. I blamed myself for the longest time for being fat. Nevermind that it was clear that my genetics were working against me as every woman in my family is fat. Nevermind that these diseases were working against me. Nevermind that I ate less than anyone I knew, my willpower obviously not being a question. No, it was still all my fault. Because of this self blaming and internalized guilt and hatred I often felt depressed and suicidal.
After I read Lessons From the Fat O Sphere by Kate Harding and Marianne Kirby that all fell away. The depression, the suicidal thoughts, the self blame and hatred and guilt. I threw away my scale and stopped counting calories. I followed intuitive eating habits and my diet balanced out. I never gained weight, or lost it either. So I stayed the same size regardless of whether I was dieting or following HAES, but with fat acceptance I was healthier and happier. Nothing can compare to that. All the fat haters out there can't argue against health or happiness. They can't say that being suicidal was better than being mentally stable. Or, if they do, they'll show themselves for the bigots they are. If it's all about health then I'm much healthier now than I ever was before while hating myself.
"International No Diet Day is an annual celebration of body acceptance, including fat acceptance and body shape diversity. This day is also dedicated to promoting a healthy life style with a focus on health at every size and in raising awareness of the potential dangers of dieting and the unlikelihood of success; the Institute of Medicine summarises: "those who complete weight loss programs lose approximately 10 percent of their body weight only to regain two-thirds within a year and almost all of it within five years." The first International No Diet Day was celebrated in the UK in 1992. Feminist groups in other countries around the globe have started to celebrate International No Diet Day" -Wikipedia
In other words, it's a day to celebrate the diversity and uniqueness of every body. A day for people like me to speak up and say that living a healthy happy life is far better than any hateful, harmful diet out there. Since 95% of diets fail and often leave dieters heavier than when they started, it seems like a no brainer to love your body, to feed it and nourish it, to move it, and to respect it. And none of those things mean losing weight. And let's not forget that health is multi dimensional and it's not a moral obligation.
So happy international no diet day everyone! It's a good day to make a resolution of self love and acceptance.
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Dreaming of Wheels
I finally dreamed of myself in a wheelchair . How we view ourselves is often hard. What we think of ourselves, even how we picture ourse...
I recently found my way here, and I love what I'm reading!
ReplyDeleteSomeone linked the fat-vegans post on FB and it really got me thinking. I so hope I will never experience such hate in the vegan communities here (Denmark, there's not many wegans here). But as I'm not fat I guess I can easily overlook it, if it has already infested us. I do however hate the diet-argument, veganism is not a diet and should not be promoted like it, but I was actually never telling anyone that I gained weight after turning vegan, as if it was a sin -hmm maybe it is here ...
Also your pictures are great, your very beautifull. I love the make-up free ones the best -it's the fact that beauty is in those and the others, and make-up is just a choice.
Keep doing what your doing, because you seem to do it right!
I'm so glad you found your way here :) thank you so much for your kind words- and thanks for being an ally. If you do see fat hate in your vegan community I hope you'll stand up for the rest of us ;) even though you're not fat, and maybe especially because you're not fat, you can do so much good. :) thank you again.
DeleteYou are SO right :) and thank you
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